5/13/12

Such a long time since posting.  My practice has been all about mindfulness meditation.  I am taking an on line class on Vipassana.  It started with focusing on breathing and then expanded to awareness of the whole body.  It is amazing to me how sensitive you can make your body by simply paying attention to a particular part of the body.  Then the class went to becoming aware of your emotions and finally to your thoughts.I have really had a lot of difficulty maintaining my practice lately.  The course was good if only to re-motivate to practice again.  This is hard.  Often my meditations are not pleasant.  I have become very aware of negative feelings and thought and it has been very painful.  Anyway the experts say that this can be normal and it is really just a process of healing.  So much of who we are is hidden away.  We have learned to dismiss and ignore it and when you learn to pay attention it is painful.  I also am not interested in journaling,  It is hard to write without thinking about the reader and what they think and that is exactly what I don't want.  I am reading a book that is also on mindfulness.  It is entitled "Rewire you Brain for Love"  I got about 1/2 way through.  It has several meditations in it and has a lot of information about meditation and brain science.